Scales
When I was 18, I formed an eating disorder. My parents were going through a divorce, and I felt like I was stuck in the middle. With what little control I had, I focused on my body. Weight, food, and exercise all factored into what became an obsession.
You can read each panel like a book, seeing how my weight progressed over weeks, months, and years. Scales without a number represent times I didn't weigh myself. Scales with red numbers signify memorable weights that greatly impacted my journey.
The first panel, Loss, not only signifies weight loss but also the loss of myself; loss of any control I had as I brainwashed myself into anorexia.
I felt highs when I jumped on the scale and saw a number lower than the last time. But I also felt extreme lows when I ate something that I thought I shouldn't or felt like I ate too much.
It became a game to me.
And I was losing.
The second panel is called Recovery.
With the help of professionals, as reluctant as I may have been at the time, I was able to start changing my mindset and gradually recover to a healthy weight.
Even though I am now within a healthy weight range, the mental aspect of my eating disorder will always be a part of me.
I have good days, and I have bad days, but over the years, I've learned how to better cope with the negative thoughts that arise.
Recovery is a journey.